too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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