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nut hugger
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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