I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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