love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Wtf am i supposed to tell my kids when they ask about my first time? "Mommy got drunk off her ass and fucked a total stranger in another stranger's bedroom, then got abandoned by the selfish prick and walk of shamed to the nearest gas station to call a cab, but ended up passed out in a park in a pool of her own puke."
At least mommy was smart enough to use protection and hack into the asshole's facebook account.
Well of course. Mommy may be a slutty drunk but she ain't no idiot.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
