last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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