in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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