Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Randomize
