You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I need water and some morals
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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