Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
