at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Randomize