Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
and you said cock pushups were impossible
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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