I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
