Old men and throwing up are my life now.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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