so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
