I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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