She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize