i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
