I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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