I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
