Already got asked if we're dating
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Randomize
