You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
