Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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