Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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