The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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