come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
