I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
All I want is dick and wine.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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