his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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