Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
