Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize