so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
