I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
