In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
