And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
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