let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
