I need help removing her.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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