I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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