Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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