Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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