I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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