Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
