Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
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