How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
