You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
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Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
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I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
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