Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
