why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
