Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize