Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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