I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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