It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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