Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my gift to your gina
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize