Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Randomize
