chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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