Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
